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The 10 painful realities in the gay scene

OK, there it be. We're all gays here. However, some are lucky, some are not. Some are blessed, but some are unfortunate. The world is not so fair. Oh, we always know that.

It has been a fact that being GAY is a million times more difficult than being STRAIGHT. When you're straight, you find yourself your queen, and off you marry. With the diminishing male/female ratio, finding your girl is as fast as finding a strand of grey hair on a 30-year-old scalp. Whereas in the gay scene, it takes a lot to find your mate. You drool over these hotties at Downelink/Manjam/GayRomeo, but as reality would have it, JUST HOW MANY GUYS YOU LIKE HERE DO YOU GET TO ACTUALLY TALK WITH?

So I did come up with a list of painful facts that spell out being GAY, as follows:

1. It takes a lot to be saleable in the market.
2. Tall + slim + toned = HOT. Otherwise = TRASH.
3. Being CHUB and/or EFFEM is a total CURSE.
4. 99% of gays are TOTAL FLIRTS.
5. The words "love" and "trust" are a powerful currency. One can actually use them to play and get what he wants, just like tokens for a SLOT machine (SL*T machine?).
6. Faithfulness is a WISH.
7. 99% of the gorgeous are CONCEITED A**ES.
8. 99% of the gorgeous SEEK THE SAME (so if you are something less, forget them; they won't even give you that second look).
9. 99% call themselves BI, or worse, STRAIGHT (funny because they S**K C*CK just the same; so what's the difference?).
10. Choosing to LOVE is 99% a nightmare, and failure in LOVE has actually created the FLIRTS.


These may sting. But deal with it. :)


JC.TSU said…
Whoa..! This is sooooo true..

Lagi kong napapansin toh.. Pero di din naman lahat ng hindi tall eh hindi na hot.. May mga kilala akong madaming nagogoyo pero di naman katangkaran..

X-factor lang din minsan ang labanan..

Yffar (^^,) said…
true for hook ups and cruisin'.


hndi ito true love kapag gnagawa ito ng mga tao.

echos lang
mel beckham said…
I disagree with "being chub or effem" as a total curse.

I don't feel being cursed.

Mas masaya ang maging malandi at maharot!

That's all.


line of flight said…
I agree with Yffar. What you describe is true for people, gay or straight, looking for casual sex. However, intimacy and meaningful relationships do not operate under these principles.

Part of the problem is that unlike straights, gays do not have deeply imprinted myths and metaphors to rely upon when figuring out the deepening of intimacy between two people, di ba? This is slowly changing with the explosion of independent gay cinema, but these few movies are nothing compared to the constant onslaught of the teleserye with the man + woman story.

This is even more amplified by our country's obsession's with children and how child-bearing functions in family-making.

So I agree with Yffar. These mathematical rules are only applicable in the calculus of hookups and are irrelevant to the matters of the heart.
Yffar (^^,) said…

I can relate to the post...

lalo na nung naging single ako and naghahanap ako ng hook up after ko makipagbreak sa ex bf ko..


ayaw tumanggap ng chubby!

discreet for same, eh issue ba kung effem ka. wakokoko.

irelate natin ito sa post ni diosa na bakla ka na ba.


pero kung Long Term Relationships,
ika nga ni Regine sa new album:
"Love knows no walls, no ceilings, no floors" so walang boundary ang pagmamahal.

The title naman is "GAY SCENE". so akma naman siya.
line of flight said…
kung yang ang totoo, nararapat nating lubusang baguhin ang gay scene!

there hasn't been enough time for all the wilmer and reds in the country to grow older together and develop collective experience of life after hookups for the everyone else to look at yet, but the seeds have been planted and they are growing.

i also don't think that this very superficial way of hooking up is necessarily a bad thing. something has to spark the passion to get to the place where we can love another.
Ming Meows said…
so nega but so true
Yffar (^^,) said…

we need to change the concept of the so-called gay scene kasi it equates to hook ups and booking.

Try entering different chatrooms or other gay sites, we will see different phrases in the profiles like:

"Discreet here, looking for same"

"No chubs, effems"

"Cute any?"
Minsan mali ang grammar pero iisa ang ibig sabihin, if you are not the one im looking for, get lost.

Very discriminating naman di ba.

This is an example of internal discrimination with in the LGBT community.

How can we change this? Mukhang mahirap, kasi most of them are looking at the superficial attributes at hindi ung tao mismo.

again, magkaiba ang hook up sa salitang pagmamahal. kaya ang labo din kasi nagseset ang mga tao, straight man o homosexuals, ng standards na hahanapin natin:

>Yung iba, talagang naka stick sa set of rules na un , kaya hindi nagtatagal. Kunwari, ang gwapo nga, maliit naman ang *toot*, aba, ibibreak na dahil maliit ang *toot*. Nakipagbreak dahil ang nasa check list niya ay biyaheng Dakota Harison Plaza

>Yung iba, despite ng napakagandang attribute ng taong nahook up nila, dahil sa pag uugali, namahal na nila kaya sila na forever, perfect combination ba kung tawagin.

>Yung iba, which is napipilitang magtagal sa relasyon kasi yung nabingwit niya eh pwdeng i front sa maraming tao na hello ang gwapo ng BF ko, kahit masama naman ang ugali.

>yung iba, which is mababang percentage lang, nagtatagal kasi mahal talaga nila ang isat isa kahit ano man ang itsura.

OMG, I need to write my own article on this, mahirap pag comment lang. hahhaha.

The point here is that, gusto man nating baguhin, ang pagbabago ay kailangang manggaling mismo sa mga taong gumagawa nito.

Ilan ba ang mga bakla sa Pilipinas, gusto man nating kausapin isa isa upang maabolish ang ganitong practice ay hindi natin kakayanin.


another unresolved issue. Hahaha.

any suggestion on how remove this mathematical equation?
line of flight said…
In my mind, turning the human experience into a series of mathematical principles that can be interchanged without looking to every experience's qualitative differences is a function of the industrial market economy upon the human experience.

I also think this very surface-objectification is a necessary consequence of having sexual autonomy (which is why the Church so opposes the gay community and the Reproductive Health bill, in the same breath!) Instead of recognizing this step in our collective psychological development, the church opposes us and the Reproductive Health bill thinking ignorance is the way of Christ!

As long as someone doesn't harm themself, this hookup part of life can be very educational and instructive. The question is how not to get stuck and be turned into stone by the engkanto of hookups, or the thought process that doesn't see humans but just two-dimensional images of how people appear to us.
carl uno said…
(laughs) true! we are all total flirts!
i beg to disagree with "chub or effem" being a curse.
well, it's not really. actually, believe it or not, i like guys who still have their baby fats as what we call them.
kasi naman po, kung sobrang firm ang katawan ng isang guy, eh ka luod tignan. grrr! makes me wanna hurl.. you know what i mean.
wala ka ng mhawak2an or mpapaglaruan nyan kung sobrang firm ang bod.
my opinion, yours?
Anonymous said…

lalo na yung number 9.. ay day, ang sarap sampalin...

for me, our gay scene must learn decency once again... hindi porket bakla ka, kailangan nang maging pokpok...

kaya witchelin gumetlocke ng jowa sa mga barlalou, unless elle paella ka na... find yourselves some decent guy, that you will not meet on sites that is conducive for deceit and fallacy...
IAN [artist] said…
This comment has been removed by the author.
that is hit the proverbial nail in the head!!! i could not agree more...

but on the other hand, i'm not really one for the scene...and never bothered about looking. there are people who are just bound to be alone, i reckon. hahahaha!!!

superficiality is tough to call on since we are all people of certain standards in mind.
Oliver said…
wow... so bitter and jaded... and I guess maraming nakaka-relate jan...

Masakit man tanggapin pero tama siya. But I agree with Yffar; prolly true ONLY for the hook up scene.

I guess it comes from our obsession with beauty (eg muscular bodies), and the obsession with "straight-acting" gays...

Although, as mentioned in of MGG's pocast, madalas tayo ang hmahanap ng sarili nating sakit ng ulo. Why go for the hot straight gays who obviously won't like you?

People will always have their preference and their prejudice. So why go after the people who won;t like you? It's like when you're the new guy looking for friends... why stick with people u don;t like and don;t like you, di ba? hanap ka na lang ng set of people kung saan benta ka.

We have to believe in our own beauty, find our own niche, and take comfort in the thought that there is someone out there for each of us...

(masyadong optimist ano? pero kase naniniwala akong one way of changing this is changing your outlook in life)
ouch! hahha. inspires me to come up with a lesbian version.

di naman sana bitter ati? ;)
Ian said…
Yung iba naman kasi it’s really their choice to dig into the gay scene and get hooked up. We can not stop them from doing what they want. My friend’s nephew and he is only 6 years old told me “Si tito may booking, sinundo nga lalake kanina, hindi mo nabutan.” when I asked the little kid where my friends was.
It is not that taboo anymore as it was years back.
Oo nga maraming bakla na pumapasok sa gay channels but I also know some who are very comfortable with them selves but hate going in those kinds of scene.
It’s about how one values himself or decides what to do with his life.
I am not also saying that gays who do not enter the gay scene are technically better than those who do.
Anyway, to comment on the article…
It’s good that this is true, so it makes it easy to isolate the right ones, the good ones, the ones you know you deserve.
Hanapin mo ang putting itlog sa isang basket nag pulang itlog diba madali lang?
The thing is sigurado ka bas a hinahanap mo?
Or pag nakita mo na sya alam mo nab a ang gagawin mo?
Minsan naman kasi the things we are looking for are found in wrong places. Kaya nga hinahanap natin.

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